Archived Dissection
Originally published at SpaceBattles Forums. May 18th, 2017. The Last Generation (1992). Tract #031. Art by Fred Carter - © 1992 Chick Publications

Originally published at SpaceBattles Forums
May 18th, 2017

The Last Generation - Tract #031 (LSTG)
Art by Fred Carter - © 1992 Chick Publications

Big Brother's nightmarish world order is just around the corner. Christ is coming soon for believers. Will you be left behind?

Commentators

Slick146

Page Index
1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	12	13	14	15	16	17	18	19	20	21	22

Introduction ⇑ ⇓

Slick146

Okay, here we go! One of the weirdest Chick Tracts ever! Ladies and gentlemen, you've heard of the boleak and snobbish Left Behind! You've been appalled by End of Days! Ghost Rider:Spirit of Vengeance made us all groan! Now, observe with complete apathy the strange and completely batshit world of.....

Cover / Page 1 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	Yes, that man looks like some kind of half assed supervillain. Ignore it. We open our story with the following.

Page 2 ⇑ ⇓

Slick146

From the World Court headquarters in Rome

Comes the most epicly boring footage of a penguin doing the polka while dressed in pin-up petunia dress!

Anyone who claims that

The penguin is actually an impervious dancer with actual talent and looks very attractive will be marched to Australia, literally marched!

I've just given into the insanity.

Page 3 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	Pictured: The wet dream of every single conspiracy theorist on the planet, except David Icke. Not enough lizards.

Page 4 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	Except our lives, each other and my collection of Dick Van Dyke pornos, but that doesn't matter! It's the fifties! No, seriously. Look at that TV. It must be the fifties.

Page 5 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	It's just like what I read in the King James Bible, right along with the part about committing adultery! I followed its teachings most faithfully.....winks at Connie's husband

Page 6 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	And the darker it is in the world, Charles, the brighter our hope becomes. Moving stuff that. Oh my god, Jack Chick wrote something moving. To follow it up, in this world of pollution, houses made to conform together and numbered for identification, we are about to meet....THE REINCARNATION OF HARRY GARNER HIMSELF!

Page 7 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	David Attenborough: And here we observe the brainwashed fascist heathen which shall go straight to hell, or Bobby eyeing his prey, having returned to his natural lair. Observe how he shows disdain for something as ordinary as a married heterosexual couple, his own parents included, and views his grandfather as if he is some kind of alien sicko. It is because he has been conditioned from a young age to follow the ways of Satan, something his parents made no effort to prevent.

Page 8 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	David Attenborough: Now we see young Bobby demonstrating his devotion to an ideology known as "a-bunch-of-evil-devil-worshipping-moronic-halfwits-who-hate-all-good-christians-for-no-discernible-or-ever-provided-reason", or as most people call them, pagan. The wide eyed and sadistic face he has clearly shows to us he is a very evil human being, who must surely burn in the fiery and eternal pits of hell forever and ever, as the good Lord decrees. The dull reaction of his parents and grandfather is completely and utterly natural.

Page 9 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	David Attenborough: Ah, now this is a treat. Here, we are seeing one of the fundamental behavioural traits of Bobby: orgasming so fucking violently his face contorts into an almost broken state of perpetual glee and happiness. Truly, nothing excites Bobby more than the thought of The Mother Goddess and burning things. The naturally occurring ignorance of his parents in mentioning God directly in front of him is a rather complicated form of suicide for their kind. They do this when they have finally had enough of life and elect to simply allow themselves to give into their natural urges and have such violent sexual intercourse they end up killing Bobby. As I said, it is a very complicated form of suicide.

Page 10 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	David Attenborough: Sensing what is about to happen, Bobby has activated the ever so reliable Tumblr defense, shutting down the parents biological urges by accusing them of bigotry. Sensing their weakness, he now follows up by refusing to go to bed, ignoring the clear biological need for sleep by pressing home his advantage, hoping to feed on their corpses after his parents have been gassed.

Page 11 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	David Attenborough: Of course, Bobby's attempt at not going to bed has failed thanks to something called sleeping medicine, which can be found in the pharmacy. For young Bobby it was most likely forcibly injected down his mouth with a needle so big it makes Brain Blessed's cock look like my pinkie finger. Now, the parents and grandparent shall discuss Jesus Christ, our lord and saviour. The parents are very poor parents, unable to find fault in how they raised Bobby, and not giving a shit about him.

Page 12 ⇑ ⇓

Slick146

Those left behind

Nick Carpathia is coming for us all.

will serve a satanic, one-world dictator.

And he is talking to you right now.

God will hit the earth with unspeakable plagues

but to give you an idea of what it is, remember disco? It's rising from the dead.

But wickedness will increase until the Battle of Armageddon

People are going to fight over a Michael Bay, Reuben. Truly, this is the end times.

Page 13 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! STEP RIGHT UP AND BUY YOUR VERY OWN NEW AGE HEALER, COMPLETE WITH WING NUTTERY AND HOMOSEXUALITY! HE SINGS, HE DANCES, HE TUCKS YOU INTO BED AT NIGHT, AND BEST OF ALL, KILLS YOUR PARENTS AND FEEDS THEM TO YOU! The Queen of Heaven Okay, everyone, one at a time, one at a time! Look, we can take turns pissing on Jack's grave! Remember, just piss on it. We're all Christians here, not savages. Cocks out and ready? You all drank those bottles of water? Good. I'll go first.....

Page 14 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	YES! A BIG REWARD See this scar kid? Yeah, I got this after eating my parents! You can two!

Page 15 ⇑ ⇓

Slick146

If I say yes, will your Healers take me away?

See, grandpa isn't feeling well, and wants to just get to Heaven now, so.....

That's none of your business!

Bobby, come with me. We are going to play a little game called, belt beating!

Which, shockingly, would be justified.

Page 16 ⇑ ⇓

Slick146

I HATE you and your Jesus!!

Intolerant jerk! You said the wrong thing! You're supposed to say, I love you grandpa!

Oh, that was depressing.

I hope the healers KILL YOU!

With their medicine and drugs and computer microchips and cookies and milk and arsenic and maple syrup and their scars and funny accents!

Hurry Charles! Take Connie and her brother, Paul,

Who I just remembered exists, despite having never spoken to since the day my maid gave birth to him!

You'll be safe there!

For all of five minutes!

Page 17 ⇑ ⇓

Slick146

We inserted microchips to increase the pain.

Inserting them took about nine hours which could have been spent actually torturing him, but we have a schedule to keep. We may be evil, but we'll be damned if we allow ourselves to not be as effective as possible!

Take this heletic away!

Oh come on, that's what Jack wanted to write.

Dispose of it, or use it for food.

Hey, remember Bobby? Tell him supper's ready!

Now you know where all the cannibalism jokes came from.

Page 18 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	And behind will come the eternal armies of HELL!!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Page 19 ⇑ ⇓



Slick146	Your reward shall be free drugs! What do you want? Speed, cocaine, LSD, cannabis, marijuana? Aren't those last two the same thing? Look, pal, I grew up watching Breaking Bad. Don't act like I don't know my drugs.