Homosexuality: Legitimate, Alternative Deathstyle - Book #01 (HDET)
Art by Dick Hafer - © 1986 Paradigm Company
First Published: December 1st, 2017
...with special Guest Commentator: John Faber
"Homosexuality: Legitimate, Alternate Deathstyle" is actually a book written by Dick Hafer waaaayyyy back in the halcyon days of 1986 when Reagan ran the country and everyone was afraid of the Bomb. AIDS had just begun coming into the public consciousness and most people (who were only just starting to call it something other than "Gay Cancer") knew almost nothing about it. This left the door wide open for uncheck fear and hate against the group seen as the primary carriers of this disease... homosexuals. Dick Hafer manages to distill and ferment this hate and fear into an almost 100 proof heady brew and then gives it to you good through a series of cartoons that can almost be referred to as "chibified." Make no mistake though, this is pure, uncut bigotry mainlined straight into your neocortex. Brace yourselves.
| Page Index | ||||||||||||||
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| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 |
| 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | |||||||||||
Page 1 ⇑ ⇓
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John If you look closely, you can see the hate oozing through the page. |
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JessicaI've noticed that in previous installments of this travesty as well. He went extraordinarily cheap on the paper stock used for printing which has contributed to a great deal of bleed through. As if this thing wasn't already indistinguishable from toilet paper... |
Page 2 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnAnd how are the Illuminati behind all this? Or are the gays.... BEHIND THE ILLUMINATI? |
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JessicaThere is a great deal of difference between "acceptance" and "tolerance." Most gay people just want to be left alone. It's you morons who are making everything so personal. |
Page 3 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnNo REAL democrat would ever put gays in his porridge! Wait... |
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JessicaI don't know about the 80's but the modern platforms of the democratic party seem to be pretty LGBT friendly. What would "REAL" democrats have their stomaches turn when it comes to gay rights? Also, what the hell is up with that donkey? Is that how we're stereotyping gays? Lipstick and earrings? |
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JohnYou just know he likes taking it in the ass. |
Page 4 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnWe should have the RIGHT! To deny dem homos the right to buy whatever house they want! Also, to teach, for some reason! I've always thought you're less likely to be hateful towards a group if you grew up with members of that group. Allowing them to teach would be a great start. |
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JessicaWould you look at that? It's almost like homosexuals want the same rights as everyone else!!! |
Page 5 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnAll that bill did was prohibit employment discrimination against homosexuals. |
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JessicaYep. We stopped those homos and their lie-beral pals but good! It's a shame Dick Hafer isn't alive to see the current political climate when it comes to gays and lesbians. Though given he wrote a 200 page book of hate against them I highly doubt it would sway his opinions all that much. |
Page 6 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaWe all know how American conservatives like to depict Europe as this barren, socialist hellscape but most of it is light years ahead of us when it comes to social progress like gay rights and same-sex marriage. |
Page 7 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaAnd the sad part is that even today unless you pay sufficient lip service to God and so-called "Christian values" you still won't get elected. Hell, Obama was pretty straight forward with his religious beliefs and people still exhausted themselves trying to prove he was a closet Muslim. |
Page 8 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnI once saw a video on YouTube (and that must mean it's true) that said the Bible was only against homosexuality because the surrounding tribes engaged in ritual sex acts for their deities, and everything that's done for a false god is EEEEEVIL! (that's also the reason for the law against clipping your sideburns.) |
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JessicaDespite what Hafer would have you believe from earlier in his book, sharing plates and silverware with someone who is gay or lesbian is no dirtier than sharing them with anyone else. |
Page 9 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnIf they don't have bread, let them eat gay! Ich bin ein Homosexueller! Veni, vidi, pedicari! |
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Jessica"Freely" used the word gay? Is there some reason he shouldn't have been allowed to say the word gay? Is it going to bring down the Knights of Standards and Practices? | |
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JohnApparently, the only modes of locomotion for gays are prancing, skipping and fart-o-the-rainbow. |
Page 10 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaCalling them "sodomites" over and over again is nothing but an ad hominem argument and shows just how weak your position really is. |
Page 11 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaOutright lie. Studds did indeed express remorse over his relationship with a seventeen year old congressional page. The page was also just one year off from the age of consent and stated himself that the relationship was consensual and non-intimidating. |
Page 12 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnWhat do you expect? They have a giant stone penis in the middle of the city! |
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JessicaYou do have a point. A great big stone dick is likely to attract gays like moths to a flame. |
Page 13 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnLAAAAAAAW! |
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JessicaAs in "Aside from anti-discrimination legislation the law should have nothing at all to say about homosexuals," right? That is what you're about to say, right?!? |
Page 14 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaAt least he's nice enough to buy ice cream for the gay guy as well. Surprising how dirty he thinks him to be. |
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JohnHis freely-rotating neck gives away his owl ancestry. |
Page 15 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaSince there are fewer gay people than there are straight people that makes them a LEGITIMATE minority too, you know. |
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JohnI just know you used that spoon to eat da poo-poo! | |
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JessicaOh, never mind. He wants to get his own spoon. <sigh> |
Page 16 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnRoll credits! WHY oh WHY should I ever want to live in a pluralist society? After all, if I were in an ISIS-controlled area, it would be perfectly moral and right for them to behead me for not following their god, so why should DEM HOMOS be any different? |
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JessicaYou should be "forced to say it's o.k." because what someone else does in the privacy of their bedroom is none of your goddamn business. That's why. |
Page 17 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnAnd you didn't take the hint that maybe you're on the wrong side of history? No? Okay, just checking. |
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JessicaIt isn't all that surprising that pro-gay legislation got shot down in Texas. What's that they say about steers and queers? |
Page 18 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaThis is similar to when he gushed over veterans roughing up gays outside the Iwojima memorial. Gays getting the shit kicked out of them seems to give Hafer a serious hard-on. And what do you call someone who enjoys seeing others in pain? |
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JohnReminds me of that scene from Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas: There once was a guy who disagreed on something about the trinity. So Saint Nick BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM! |
Page 19 ⇑ ⇓
Page 20 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnWarning: Any orifices left unprotected may be subject to a surprisingly pleasant time. Please keep the following items on your person at all times: bible (KJV), rosary (do NOT stop turning), K-Y jelly, protective butt-plug. |
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JessicaOnce again, there's nothing gays do to restaurants, hotel beds or public restrooms that any other person wouldn't do. |
Page 21 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnYes, we will hire even YOU, homosexual degenerate! No longer will you have to hide your disgusting true self, just to be a productive member of society! Who knows, maybe one day people will treat you as if you're human. |
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JessicaFair?!? After everything you've said in the book so far you have the brass-iron BALLS to talk about fair?!?!? |
Page 22 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnOpenly gay people can become judges! Dogs and cats living together, MASS HYSTERIA! |
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JessicaWe've had medical and other benefits for same-sex partners both here and abroad for some time now and as you can plainly see the world has not come to an end. |
Page 23 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnWait... he wouldn't.... no nonono he CAN'T GO THERE.... |
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JessicaOh yes he can... Frankly I'm surprised it took him this long. |
Page 24 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaSuffice it to say that child molestation and homosexuality going hand-in-hand has been a scare tactic used for about as long as there have been gay people (i.e. forever). There is no proven correlation. |
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JohnI should've known, this was inevitable. Not only does this make my blood boil on its own, some people even demand the death penalty for homosexuals because they think they're all pedophiles. |
Page 25 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnNO! NO NO NO NO NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOO! |
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JessicaSee? NAMBLA even makes the gay guy sick. Probably because he's just like everyone else. |
Page 26 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnSo, the argument here seems to be: Homosexuality is wrong because pedophiles also exist. Gotcha. |
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JessicaThere's some contention as to whether the René Guyon Society even exists so their supposed motto is really neither here nor there. |
Page 27 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnActually, that's more like 10% for homosexuals. And if you let people place themselves on a spectrum, things get even more interesting. |
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JessicaThe number of people who could be classified as "strictly heterosexual" in a Kinsey scale sort of way is a hell of a lot lower than most of these jerk-offs want to give credit. |
Page 28 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaChildren 8 to 12 years old and alienated from their families are particularly vulnerable to lots of different things. It's a pretty good reason not to disown your gay son or daughter, wouldn't you say? |
Page 29 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaOk, now you are just stretching. What comes next? "Homosexuality and Alien Abduction?" |
Page 30 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnIt looks like Correlation and Causation have finally found together! If only Source Referencing hadn't been left out. |
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JessicaIf such a large percentage of gays vs. straight people are admitting to these things, did you ever stop to think that maybe gays are just more honest than straight people? |
Page 31 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnOh, there's a reason for the suicide thing. It's little wastes of oxygen like Dick Hafer here who are actively pushing gays and lesbians all over the country into unlivable situations. |
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JessicaThere's Bluto again, ready to go at it. We've come full circle here. |
Page 32 ⇑ ⇓
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JessicaStraight people engage in S&M just as much, if not more, than gay people. Also, sadomasochism is all about consent. So the likelihood of it leading to mixing "sex and death" is pretty slim, Dick. |
Page 33 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnAll I could find on this was one article on Liberty News Now and a Reddit forum theorizing that serial killers and homosexuals both tend to have abusive childhoods. Truly alarming. |
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JessicaGlobal temperatures have started to rise lately as well. Maybe the heat is causing all of those mass and serial murders. Ya think??? |
Page 34 ⇑ ⇓
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JohnSo there are the FACTS* of homosexuality. *blatant lies |
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JessicaAnd now our degenerate homosexual fellow starts seeing the error of his ways and wants out. |
Conclusion⇑ ⇓
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JohnOf course that's the note we're gonna end on! Let me guess: The next chapters are gonna talk about the declassification of homosexuality as a mental disease in 1974 (and several times more after that), Pray the Gay Away™ and electroshock therapy. That's gonna be fun. See ya then! |
Jessica
John