What do you get when you mix Catholic superstition with voodoo? Santeria! But there is a way out...
Page Index
Introduction
Cover | 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9
| 10 | 11 | 12
| 13 | 14 | 15
| 16 | 17 | 18
| 19 | 20 | 21
Conclusion
"Evil Eyes" is about Santeria, but it's really an opportunity for Chick to take another swing at Catholicism. Roberto's family visit coincides with his cousin being turned into a zombie. Roberto casts out the evil spirit, but Carlos is resistant to leaving Santeria behind. However, misshapen Catholic priest Father Dominic is impressed by Roberto's acts, and converts on the spot. |
Introduction |
Andrew: |
"I ain't got no Santeria, I ain't got no crystal ball!" This tract, however, does have Santeria (but no crystal ball).
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Jessica: | I know Chick likes to strike at things he thinks are social evils so I can understand his Homosexuality tracts and his Halloween tracts, but Santeria? A lot of people in America have never even heard of it. Is this the most pressing issue he could come up with?
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Andrew: |
But like a lot of other tracts *cough* Uninvited *cough*, this one purports to be about about thing (Santeria), but it's really something else (another anti-Catholicism tract).
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Jessica: | That rooster knows he's screwed. "Ulp..."
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Andrew: | This has some of the most vivid cover art I've seen in a Chick tract recently. That saturated red tone really stands out.
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Jessica: | Yeah, they must have shelled out for such an impressive two color job.
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Jessica: |
I guess there's some sort of referral network for this sort of thing. Like whoever directed this guy over to her gets %20 off his next voodoo doll or something.
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Andrew: |
Do we ever find out what the hell Carlos did that made this guy want to turn him into a zombie?
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Jessica: | What the bloody blue hell is wrong with that guy's face? He looks like an emaciated Santa Claus who's been sleeping face-down in a dumpster for about a week.
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If you turn him into a vegetable, I don't think he's really going to wish he was never born. I don't think vegetables think about much of anything. I also kind of like the implication that because Carlos is a relative that he doesn't want him killed, merely turned into a turnip. I guess Hobo Claus has a heart after all.
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Andrew: | This setup suggests a whole backstory to this comic: all these people- Hobo Claus, Carlos, Roberto, his mother, and Maria, are closely related. Do we ever find out what's going on? Nope.
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Jessica: |
And while we're on the topic, does this guy mean turn Carlos into a vegetable like Terri Shiavo, or a vegetable like the Jolly Green Giant?
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Jessica: |
You know, UPS has overnight delivery. It makes a lot more sense than having Joey Square-Jaw here take a bus 300 miles to deliver it personally.
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Andrew: | I get the feeling Roberto is the kind of gullible chump who gets taken advantage of pretty much constantly. "Hey Roberto, do my laundry." "Hey Roberto, take care of my kids." "Hey Roberto, deliver this package 300 miles away." And all the time he's thinking, "Wow, I'm helping!"
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Jessica: |
Oh, no. The mom's an unbeliever. Tsk Tsk. It's a miracle Roberto turned out to be such a fine, upstanding member of the community instead of a godless, baby-eating atheist.
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Jessica: |
Carlos actually kind of looks like a zombie already. This should be an easy job.
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Andrew: | And here's the one thing everyone knows about Santeria- the use of chickens.
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Jessica: |
<snicker> It looks like she's blowing smoke up that rooster's ass. He looks rather shocked and dismayed about it, too.
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Jessica: |
This must seem so damn foreign and frightening to Chick and his constituents. Though compare this with Speaking in Tongues, which is far more mainstream though no less weird. I think this is kind of a matter of perspective.
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Andrew: | I like how Chick specifies they are "African" spirits. Like, they were born there? I thought, in Chickland, that everyone who didn't worship Jesus just flat-out worshipped the devil.
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Jessica: |
I am trying SOOOO hard not to make cock jokes every time this poor rooster pops up. Hopefully now that it's dead I won't have to work so hard... ...looks like he's got the drips, though. DAMN IT!!! I tried!!! I TRIED!!!
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Andrew: | Talk about a limp cock. I see there's a photo of Carlos in the pot. Is that necessary for the spirits to figure out just which Carlos they're targeting? How did they do this before the advent of photography?
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Jessica: |
So, the spirits they're dancing with are good (or neutral) but this one that comes in and blasts a hole in his chest is evil. Do they know each other? One gets you high, the other gives you a coronary?
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Jessica: |
What is wrong with this guy's face? Does Chick have NO idea what human beings look like? He'd be better off illustrating for Mad Magazine if he keeps this up.
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Andrew: | In case we might miss the point, Chick has crammed every spare inch of these panels with Catholic iconography.
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Jessica: |
Maria is holding a blackface Mr. Potato Head doll. Looks like those crazy Catholics will put their faith in any idol that doesn't get out of their way fast enough.
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Jessica: |
I know there's some overlap between Catholicism and Santeria, but I think it would be a conflict of interest for someone to be both a Catholic priest AND a Santero priest. I may be wrong.
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Andrew: | "My Jesus can!" And my Jesus is stronger than your Jesus! And smarter and better looking. And girls like him too!
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Jessica: |
This guy just butts right in and starts getting all belligerent with everyone. Well, you'll know they're Christians by their love, I guess.
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Jessica: | Dominic hangs back, shaking his little fist. |
Andrew: |
Again, crucifixes are a Catholic thing, not a Santeria thing. In case anybody is missing the point...
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Jessica: |
His Jesus is alive. Jésus Garcia. He runs the liquor store down on 23rd Street.
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Andrew: |
I wonder why this character in the right panel keeps trying to calm down the mob. He's in several panels, and never gets a name or any motivation for his actions. He seems to be there just to ensure Roberto gets enough time.
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Jessica: |
Holy shit. It's Morgan Spurlock. Times must be tough for him to be moonlighting in this travesty.
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Jessica: | This guy has a serious case of paranoia going on. I wouldn't be surprised if he keeps his toenail clippings and jars of his own urine in his closet. Tissue boxes on his feet...
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Andrew: |
I like how he's reminding God about that promise, as if He doesn't remember- or perhaps would prefer to forget. "Aww, crap, guy, I hoped you'd forget about that promise."
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Jessica: |
Well that's a pretty good deal for God, now isn't it. If you ask for something, God did it. If it doesn't happen, it wasn't His will. It's a win-win for him.
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Jessica: | What the hell IS that thing? It's like something you'd clear from a stopped drain or something.
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Andrew: |
It looks like a horrible Mexican stereotype. Or a Spencer Gifts mask.
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Jessica: |
"A very powerful devil... in the shape of a zombie." ...wearing a Frankenstein mask and a vampire cape. Basically every cliché Halloween costume you've ever seen on an eight year old.
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Andrew: | Now, keep in mind what Carlos has just been through, and how very concerned he is. Now contrast this with his later behavior... go on, I'll wait. Notice anything? Yeah. We'll deal with this further when we get down to those panels.
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Jessica: |
Uh oh. It's a dangerous time for Carlos. I hear men get that a lot though. "That empty place they left inside you." Actually... ewwww...
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Andrew: | I was kind of hoping we'd get the "evil heart" image that was used in Uninvited. We've gone from having this conversation inside a house to conversing on the inside of a hollow gray sphere. Guess Chick didn't feel like illustrating the house.
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Jessica: |
Roberto will help you fill that empty space. Bow-chicka-bow-wow.
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Andrew: | Carlos seems surprisingly credulous of all this.
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Jessica: |
Just swallowing this swill hook, line and sinker.
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Jessica: |
Jesus can deliver you from the zombies. I hear he has first hand knowledge of them.
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Andrew: | And our helpful delaying friend is at it again, pleading, without apparent motivation, for more time for Roberto, whom he may have never met. You'd almost expect this to be a setup for something, but Chick never follows up. What happened to the mouse indeed.
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Jessica: |
Hobo Claus is back!!!! And now he wants to kill Roberto too! His murderous rage knows no satiety.
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Jessica: |
John 3:16. Yadda yadda yadda. Couldn't we get a nice Revelations passage on occasion?
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Andrew: | Ooh, it's that "suffering Christ" image, as seen in such tracts as Fame.
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Jessica: |
Here's an interesting bit of theology. Jesus's resurrection sent "shock waves into Satan's kingdom." But the Harrowing of Hell is a strictly Catholic belief. Jack's in trouble, the idolatrous mackerel-snappers are starting to rub off on him.
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Jessica: |
Carlos is sniffing the remaining coke off his hand.
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Andrew: | Remember, this guy was a possessed vegetable (as if that's not a contradiction...), was scared for his life, but now he's all like "how about I think about it... it might be inconvenient." Does he have the worlds worst short term memory or something?
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Jessica: |
"I'll give you my answer outside." That isn't suspicious in the least. Go right ahead, Robby.
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Andrew: |
And now the events of the past 24 hours vanish into smoke and haze for Carlos, as he instantly turns on the guy who saved him (and whom he knows saved him). I know, I know, he's a bad guy, but jeez, you'd think basic self interest would push him in the other direction, or at least encourage him not to betray the guy.
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Jessica: |
Why that two-timing Mesican A-Hole! And this angry mob has no conviction! They were going to kill him, but instead they just put him on a bus. Drop a bridge on his ass or something!!! Have some self respect.
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Andrew: |
So Dominic knew that he was working with evil spirits and phony saints. In Chickland, all evil-doers seem to be aware of it. They can never just be mistaken, or have a differing idea of what constitutes good, they always have to deliberately do bad things.
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Jessica: |
Here comes the punch line. It was never about Carlos at all, but saving Father Dominic. Like all the "abortionists" throughout the Chick-verse, he's known all along he was leading others astray, but he did it ANYWAY!!!
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Jessica: |
That's a pretty unique way of getting Catholics to convert to your cause. Call them whores.
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Andrew: |
Again, Dominic knows that he works for Jack Chick's version of the Catholic Church, and yet he stuck around until now?
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Jessica: |
I like this tossed off ending. Then this happened, then this other thing happens and Whammo-Blammo! Everybody goes to Heaven! Like Chick ran out of panels and needed to finish up right quick.
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Conclusion |
Andrew: |
I think I know what Chick was thinking when he wrote this tract. "Oh boy, Santeria! This will allow me to deal with the occult and smack down Catholics all in one blow!" I guess this is intended as one of his "tracts for believers of other religions", like "The Visitors". I'm told his depiction of Santeria belief is fairly accurate. Still, I don't know how resonant Santeria is for most people. I doubt many Americans have heard of it as anything other than the title of that Sublime song I quoted up in the introduction. It just seems like an awfully small-bore issue for Chick, like doing a tract about LARPing, until you consider that his real target here is the Catholic church. Notice that Roberto never really says "you shouldn't believe in Santeria", but he definitely calls the Catholic church a whore. I guess that Chick's already done most of the obvious ways to attack the Catholics, with tracts such as "Why Is Mary Crying?", "Papa", and "The Death Cookie", but he keep coming up with new angles. Never discount the obsession of Jack Chick.
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Last
Modified:
February 14, 2023
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